THE following reflective piece of writing will look at the subject of exchange and reciprocity within the surrounding context of those I have relationships with spanning from my family to my friends and others.

I belong to a family of three that being my mother, brother and myself. Being exposed to the phenomenon of single parent family structure has really worn away the essence of what makes a father, as my mother embellishes this role like many other single mothers do so. What makes matters worser now is that my elder brother has failed to live to the expectations of what elder children should do such as parenting the younger ones and having to assist in financial terms. This has all been left to my mother who herself did not have a comfortable upbringing. Seeing my living conditions even through the sacrifices of my mother all in the name of having to provide for the family, I am also conversely left with a huge gap of having to continue where she has stopped once I am in a financial position to do so. I obviously know that I owe it to her big time however that will be my start of a bigger contribution of gratitude.

In the African community there exists a humanly centred notion which is that of ubuntu, which calls upon for the greater significance of having to preserve human dignity. I have witnessed this from a greater portion of my family members whereby, they showed up for my intermediate family in times of financial need and mere support through their presence and interventions. Making it fair that I should also return the same courtesy to those who have done so. Obviously in this stance it may take the form of generalized reciprocity that may span from having to babysit some of nephews and nieces or helping out during family events.

I would describe myself as someone particular and in so doing I have rather been really selective of those that I associate myself with and consider to be friends with. As you cannot be vulnerable with everyone, whereby you can naturally feel comfortable with someone by the virtue of their energies, or you may connect with someone on the basis of interest levels. There are many different reasons that may explain why people decide to become friends however, what governs most relationships is the condition of mutual support, emotional support, being available for the other, learning seeds of growth from the other, doing things together and the list continues. In this way, the people within the friendship may benefit differently from each other, and the friendship may not look so balanced all the time. Although, I do believe that it is what that makes us human, with having to compromise, being tolerant and extending grace to the other person as who we come from different walks of life and have been exposed to different life conditions and belief systems.