As I identify the African ethnicity, which falls under the Zulu culture, I as well identify as a Christian since I grew up in a household not participating in tradition. I have endogenous teachings I would like to share which I believe in, and which have been a guard towards my life. 

A GIRL SUSTAINING THEMSELVE AND KEEPING THEIR VIRGINITY UNTIL MARRIAGE. 

In nowadays it is a norm for young girls at a very early stage to experience sex. Yes, they get teachings about it at lower grades, they get the curiosity of what it is and how it is done etc. A little earlier on sex was a frightening word and disgusting act or vice versa. We were taught that it was for our elders and we kind of already knew about it being sacred. Hence why we, girls of the Zulu ethnic group were taught to sustain ourselves, we were told about the beauty of waiting, the beauty of embracing our virginity and how a light that was. We are called "IZIMBALI ZEZWE", traditionally they are called to the kings' yards to celebrate their pride. But I, I was told about the power of waiting until marriage, which is believed to be the right time and that God would send that right perfect at his own perfect timing. This does not only keep us away from all the disasters of the outside world like, early unwanted pregnancies, diseases. But it prevents giving one's body to many other bodies, unintentionally obviously. We believe that carrying ourselves with dignity goes along with good fortunes following our way. Again, it is another alternative way of showing respect to our parents and families. 

BEING KIND AND HUMANE TO EVERYONE.

My elders taught me to be kind, not only to rich, fine, privileged looking people but to everyone I come across with. I was taught that a person cannot be minimized, that, that one dirty, surrounded by bad odor person I would act bad upon, or that one crazy man crossing my way asking for the bread I would be holding might be an angel. Mistreating other people is very offensive and brutal according to my beliefs.  My grandmother once taught me that she knew a lady who kept on chasing away a crazy man asking for water. When she finally had decided to offer him water after his refusal of going away, she served him in a dirty unpleasant cup. Only to find out that, that crazy man was an angel in human form that she had mistreated. Our principle is that " DO UNTO OTHERS AS YOU WOULD LIKE THEM TO DO UNTO YOU" which is hard to practice but worth it. Kindness draws kindness towards you, excessive one for that matter, so whether to our parents, or a random little child outside deserve to be respected and served with kindness. I was taught that what if that little kindness that you give is what could have saved the day? I was taught that any elder outside your household is your parent. So should be treated with kindness and respect. 

These practices teach us not only to serve well the outside people but ourselves too. Sometimes it expands our lives, shapes them into good and blossoming blessings themselves. These are one of the teachings I live according to and have witnessed them working for me and other people I look up to. 

Networking with our surroundings is one core shapers of our lives, wellbeing, behavior not to forget about the attitude. Social network has had a huge impact in my life because of those I rely on. Not only family and friends, but also to those I come across with once in a daily basis. Right here I am to lay how reciprocities affect our lives living in our societies and homes.

GENERALISED RECIPROCITY.

This effect does not only accommodate families but non-kin relations as well. Starting from my family, those I rely deeply on without them expecting me to reflect anything of same value to whatever they would have provided for me. Yes, it might sound like a negative reciprocity, and it is. Especially if parents buy for us things we could not return back at the same scale, they do things for us more than we could ever be obedient at being sent to the store to buy a packet of potatoes. Back to the generalized reciprocity, my family give to me without expecting me to give back anything at same value. There is no count to what we do and return to each other. It is a norm, a life and what is supposed to happen. I provide emotional support to them so as they do to me, run errands, do chores and etc. Just like they provide to me anything I need at appointed time sometimes. How we are obligated to each other is not under inspection for we oblige ourselves overtime.

Our families mostly, provide moral linkage toward us more than we could ever be instrumental in our households. They share love, care and their time to us. It is something unbuyable, but it is what we could offer back to keep the pattern running, life to not resume. To add on, they provide shelter, which is a domestic structure, food, access to economic capital, without any observation of what who should do next simply because one has provided something. We all benefit to each ones returned services even though they would not be equal.

BALANCED RECIPROCITY.

Although I have friends which are non-kin, but we share a very adamant bond. We do not expect another to do anything as quick when another has done something, bought something, we oblige ourselves overtime, yes, generalized reciprocity. Right here it is friends who expect something of equal value or similar value in return. Just like this one friend I had, she once bought me a bracelet, and she was expecting me to buy her something of similar value to what she has bought for me maybe on her birthday. She didn't have to breath it out, it was there, it had to happen, we shared a balanced reciprocity.

In conclusion, what would have life been if I or you, were the only one living? Allowing yourself to be assisted and to assist is one cycle that could never fade. My perspective is that it keeps the whole world, life at balance.

Sources which i have read concerning about how stereotypes are cooked, how judgements are created and how criticism was uprooted really uncovered my eyes about how life is experienced by us all as a whole. How life is experienced by every individual and how it is a complete diverse from what another is experiencing at simultaneous timelines.

I used to judge girls my age who got pregnant while still in high school .I always asked myself why they would choose to fall in that trap of stupidity while they would have focused on their books instead. I found it hard to understand how they would let themselves fall pregnant even after the strict teachings given by parents and mostly ,free preventative methods ,however they still chose to grab the opportunity. I continued with my judgements until one stranger pregnant lady my age out of nowhere approached me and started telling me how her uncle forced himself on her and got her pregnant then disappeared from the traces of the history of life. I remember that story was my awakening about the majority of things, that experiences of different lives could never be the same.

Yes there was absolutely someone who got pregnant due to their ignorance somewhere but it's not the same to the other one .Criticism obstructs us from identifying the actual truth about the lives of our surroundings at large. This corresponds to what Ngozi Adichie has stated ,''Consequences of the single story is that it robs people dignity'' (Ngozi:2020).

in conclusion having an ideal of your own assumptions and perspectives is dangerous because you tend to focus and believe on one outcome you have heard , about something or someone while you leave other possible outlives they might have on the wild.